About making a move

Today's post is about making a move just as the title suggests lol.

why? Because last thursday when I went pay a visit to HB Sexy and she warmly said hello to me, then there was big kinoing but unfortunately i was feeling out of state and without realizing I went to play "hard to get" and I'm all about being genuine and reciprocating interest, specially when I'm in the sexual stage of the relationship!

Thing is early in the conversation she told me she felt alone and didn't wanted to go to her place that night all alone, now because of being out of state (and okay because I didn't expected her to want sex this early, it was after all just the second meeting) I misunderstood what she meant and told her it's ok being alone and that she had me, things will get better yada yada yada...

Now after telling this story to a girl friend I can now look backwards and I can see that after this she got a little less interested, and she started giving me some shit like "why don't you look at me when I dance for you? Am I not sexy enough for you?"

And now she's flaked on me, I though it was because that "playing hard to get attitude" but now I realize it's because I ignored her insinuation, that may have disappointed her, or made her thing I'm just an innocent boy or who knows... what I know is that it took the interest away from her.

In my defense however I want to point it was 2nd day I met her at the bar and wasn't expecting the relation to go sexual, my logistics wouldn't have even aloud it, but I should have been ready for it and use these logistics to boost the sexual tension and simply postpose sex for later

Now I've experienced what PUGs say, A woman get's offended when you don't make move so now that I learned it the hard way I can only say to every guy reading this....

MAKE A MOVE!!!!!!!!

Jude

what to expect after an SOI?

One of the biggest questions I hear when I suggest someone to SOI (statement of intent), meaning letting a girl you like sexually that you like her because of some personal trait i.e " You're a really good painter I think that's sexy about you", is isn't it too needy? what if she responds badly? I just found this sentence about it on Dan's blog and I think it couldn't be more clear:

"The important thing with a SOI is knowing that once you state your intent, you don’t need their approval, response, or acceptance of it. If they continue in the interaction it is clear where it is going and they can get out any time they like. Simply continuing with you means they are accepting your SOI."

http://www.charismatips.com/change-in-soi-statement-of-intent/

So be selfish don't look for their approval or their reaction, if they stay it's good, that's all the IOIs (indicator of interest) you need.

I hope it helps to make more clear what I mean by doing an SOI and not being afraid from a reply.

At least it helped me recheck ;)

Jude

Strip night! BIG fun

A year ago I was introduced to the strip bars activity by the guy who thought me MM, for the record it's not a strip club, it's a strip bar so it means girls serving you dance, can do shows but most importantly they stick around you and it's up to you to talk with them if you want to (I recommend you do otherwise they'll feel like just a piece of meet and unless you want a show they'll leave to talk to other clients.)
Anyway I haven't been there in a big couple of months and a friend wanted to go too.
As soon as we got in we got opened by a nice HB I'll call G. After she got our order and served us she stayed so I made some quick OEQs listened to her answers and proceed with the cycle while relating as much as I could. She was a little bit serious though and my friend started asking "So do you dance?" and she said "I'm not in the mood right now", i asked her why and continued relating until she left for a while, then another girl was passing by, probably a 10 and my friend just held eye contact with her and smiled, she was with us in a matter of seconds, it though to myself "well done", my advice to him was to ask any girl he'd talk to OEQs and genuinely listen to her... Since he doesn't believe in game (yet) because he thinks it's just fake routines so it wasn't time to prepare him and teach the CA way. Now he saw me in action things are changing.

after some talking with HB10, G came back and showed HB10 that we we're her set, so sadly HB10 left. but G was now happier she did start dancing and wanted me to watch her, then she asked me about my GF and other logistics and asked us how was our first time. She couldn't believe me I'm a virgin and thought i was full of bullshit, then she related and told us she had a bf who was a virgin and if she hadn't told him what's the front or the back he wouldn't have known so I DQed and said something like "No way! You know I'm just like him I have no idea what's a woman front or back" she gave a "you liar, you' ve got great game look" and then laughed so I said "Well if you still don't believe me we can check "
It was going well, at several times she put her hands above mine, I couldn't kino pretty much since I'm not allowed too but she's is allowed to touch me as much as she wants. So by this time she was dancing even more looking at me in the eyes, searching for ways to please me, since we gave her a bad time telling her that if she didn't dance was because she wasn't pretty good at it I SOIed and said " Okay I was wrong, you really do some sexy dancing", she started to dance more, and we talked for a while it was fun but that was like the top of the escalation, we ran out of things to say so she eventually left to attend some other clients because she had to anyway but kept coming back to us I teased her with a smile saying "Hey you're back, I thought you'd left us for good" then my friend did something needy kind of like "Yes why did you leave us? we feel pretty alone when you leave us like that." And then she left again of course, so I've started to teach some basics of natural game since then.

But back to our business, my friend just started saying "hi" to another girl passing by and she was with us minutes later, I must recognize even if he has no game he doesn't know either what Approach Anxiety is. Again we do some talking and then they all leave and there's a show going on, nice!

this girl starts walking on the middle of the bar and as she comes towards us my friend said again "hi how are you to her" she ignored us then, so I thought he did a mistake but he got a nice surprise then I won't spoil around here.

So the message to anyone reading this is be bold take some risk and have some courage, even if you don't have game yet or fell badly AA, a girl can forgive those as long as you approach her, it can be the dumbest thing a "hi" works perfectly fine.

Better interactions

It's been a while now since I've been into CA and I can tell I'm way happier now. My interactions are way smoother, I get opened by people and when we're talking they often try to qualify to me and they listen closely to what I say.

For example yesterday after working out I met with a friend of mine who happened to be with two other guys, in my AFC days I would have been too scared to start conversation wit them now it was easier, I won't say it was natural I still far away of it but I could still ask little thinks like "where are you studying?" and "how long have you been on it?" and take the conversation from there on.

Back to the topic there's a guy with whom I have become friends, and even waited for me since I had to do another thing before meeting them again for dinner.

In dinner we played a dice game and even more people joined us, I had a smoke with one of them, then we talk a bit more before they all leave, living me and my new friend that chose to stay with me while I was waiting for a pal to bring my car back since he had taken it earlier.

We then joined another table with people he knew, all of them lawyers and economists students, so we had a nice time talking about it since I'm quitting economics and going to law.

I made a couple of extra friends and they all study in my college, nice!

Then there's the interactions I had today, I had a group work with 9 more people, so we met at the university and had lunch before getting to work, I talked mostly to the leader of the group, he then asked me a lot of things and we were the center of conversation, the only girl that was there laughed at many of my comments, and others did too actually, I find Juggler's idea so true, you aren't funny by trying to be funny but by being on the moment and having fun, funny just starts popping out without me even trying.

Overall it was a good week end and I find my conversation skills are improving, I'm pretty happy about it.